Jun 212015
You have a right to love and be loved without being judged

You have a right to love and be loved without being judged

Hello Visitor and welcome: On my site – under comments – there are words  from a lesbian who is somewhat frustrated in trying to find a life partner.

I wrote these thoughts in my response to her.  Maybe they might be helpful to you – or they might be used in a conversation to help a friend.  I blog or write to inform and help people.  We can all make a difference where we are planted.  Hugs, paula.Unknown

My Comments:

I understand your need to find a life partner.   This is very noble and necessary. As a lesbian (or anyone) you have a right to find love and be loved back. I have some thoughts, but you are always the one in control to make decisions.

  1. You are on the right path.   You have accepted who you are – a lesbian. Welcome to the rainbow sisterhood that is all around the world. Lesbians have been in existence from the Dawn of Civilization – perhaps, hidden at times because women were the “property” of men – and in some cases the STILL are property or controlled.vietnamese-lesbians_c6b385dbec4b9b65e8f202cbaf93d812
  2. Be careful in you live in a homophobic country. Find the right and careful words like “I really would like to have a deep and lasting friendship with you.”
  3. Ann left and Katherine

    Ann left and Katherine

    There are ways to work up to intimacy. Ask for a massage and give one – but again be careful. Ask questions, “Do you think gays/lesbians are born this way?” or “Back years ago, I had a crush on a girl? Do you think I was going through a phase?”

  4. If you find a potential girl – don’t rush it. This can make a girl afraid – some girls are NOT at the commitment level. Put pressure on them and they will RUN.
  5. Be a good friend – don’t pressure – have fun (seriousness can make people afraid. While having fun, you can state casually, “I could do this kind of this forever.” Leave it at that. or “I am so glad that I met you; life is great when we are together.
  6. The brides with Master, Shi Chao-hwei in Taiwan

    The brides with Master, Shi Chao-hwei in Taiwan

    Give lots of compliments – but don’t be gushy or overdo them.

  7. There are NO guarantees of: true feelings – commitment – honesty – fidelity. Be patient – have fun- and let the future take care of itself.
  8. Sometimes, we fall into the ‘romantic stage’ where we are putting our dreams on others. Yes, it would be wonderful to have a life partner and….other dreams. Take it easy. I was in a few relationships that I thought would work out – and I was determined to learn from them and become a better person and not make the same mistakes – or let others take advantage of me.
    Lesbians are everywhere!

    Lesbians are everywhere!

    Now, I’ve been legally married for over 10 years.   We still have our fights, but we are committed and loyal – we don’t flirt or cheat.

  9. Meditate - pray - visualize what you want

    Meditate – pray – visualize what you want

    If you are a spiritual person – I’d recommend prayer.



images-23Good luck .   Keep me informed. I am sending out rainbow hugs to you.  paula.  End of comments.

P.S.  I am not a psychiatrist or psychologist.  I am not a counsellor, but I try to be a friend.  The experts are needed and they have expertise, but I believe that a friend can work “miracles” even suggesting you get professional help.  “Life is Good.”

UnknownIf you stand in a long line of earth’s people – you will find a SHORT line in front of you.  These are the rich and famous.

But, look back from where you stand.  There is an incredibly LONG line of people far worse off than you – they have diseases, no homes, no food or water, no jobs, no future.  They are often the victims of rape, torture, war and spousal abuse.  If they are girls and women, they often have no rights or access to education.  Yes, for most of us – Life is Good.

Women's bodies are so wonderful!  Remember that minds and hearts and feeling are attached.  Be kind to one another!

Women’s bodies are so wonderful! Remember that minds and hearts and feeling are attached. Be kind to one another!

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